This evening, on the way home from a party, I heard the following on the radio.

I think a person can show too much patience. But you can never show too much forgiveness.

What do you think of this idea? First, patience. What is patience, but endurance under some kind of adverse condition? Normally, isn't that a great attribute? I think so. Definitely. Now, should it have limits?

I think it should. I think the limit should come where the person or event requiring your patience has taken away your power to freely offer it. In other words, are you being patient because you know it is the best response to a given situation, or are you being patient because you fear the outcome of impatience? Don't kid yourself. If you're only being patient because you feel paralyzed at the thought of doing anything else, maybe you've reached the limits of your patience. Maybe you should find the power to express what you really feel, and the courage to accept the consequences of being yourself.

Now, forgiveness. I think forgiveness, and by this I mean true forgiveness and not just the nice gesture people give because they think it makes them good, is always a gift. It's always under your power to give to another person. Maybe you can think of a time when it's not given under your own power, but I've thought about it for a while and I can't come up with an example, because simply put, if it's not freely given, it's not forgiveness. It's something else.

So, I think when that person said that forgiveness should be limitless, what they were actually saying is that your power of self-expression is what should be limitless. You should always maintain a sense of responsibility over your own emotions, with the right to express that you are a human being, subject to human failings and frailties, with the power to move past them, and start over. Or if not start over from square one, to start again.

You should always maintain the power to start again. Yeah. I agree with that. I never want to give up my power to start again. If forgiveness grants that gift to special people in my life, I always want to have the ability to do that for others.

You're right. It's something to think about.

--Laura