It was summer, last year, when I figured out what I wanted to do with the next 5 years of my life. Well, that's not exactly right. I believed I could do it all at once and spreading out the tasks to five years seemed like wasting time. I knew, however, that what I like to call "The Mountain" had dropped out of the sky, nearly fully formed, and it was going to take me a while to scale it.
It's now January. It's a new year. I got a nice Christmas letter from a cousin of mine who lives in Illinois, and she asked if I had made progress in my goal to move to Colorado. I had given her a run down of my plans last year - to get myself out of debt. To sell my house and move back out west, a place I've wanted to return to since 1995. To obtain financing for a retail franchise and become a businesswoman. My five year plan. I was able to email her and let her know that, despite the economic setbacks facing the country, I am still on track.
Well, the funny part is that today is one of my Days of Doubt. Also what's funny is that my Days of Doubt happen, not when I'm doing poorly, but when I'm succeeding. I set the goal to pay off my student loan early, and I did, by nearly a year. The next goal is to raise money for an emergency savings account - something to have so I'm not hanging out there in the event of an unexpected expense. One of the money gurus of the day recommends having $1000 in savings. I didn't think I had anything near that amount - I'd been draining myself dry making quadruple payments on my loan. But I had been putting small amounts back into my savings account at the end of each month, and it turns out that I'm already half way there. I can easily raise the other half by the end of January.
How about that?
But a few days ago, a friend reminded me that "if you want to stay on track, you need to be making the changes to the house that you want to make, in order to make it rentable." I'd already shared with her that in this economy, I thought the best plan was to rent my house and not try to sell it outright. But to do that, I'd like to make some upgrades -- tile down on the kitchen floor, ceiling fans in each room, things like that. She suggested that I buy these things in advance, and get the man who said he'd do it to come out and give me an estimate. Then I could leave him the key when I took my March vacation and he could handle the kitchen tile then, and it would be waiting on me when I got home.
Doesn't that sound slick? Is that what I should use the emergency fund for? And after the emergency fund has been saved, I still have my second (and last) debt to tackle. And I have dogs to take to the vet. And I have holes I need to fill in the back yard. And do I want to get new windows to make the house more energy efficient? Do I want a home warranty, to cover those items which are aging? Will a renter care about a garden, or should I fill my vegetable garden with rose bushes? And I need to get my riding lawn mower repaired. And because I don't think it's a good idea to leave a riding lawn mower with a renter, I need to trade it in on a more modest, easier to operate push mower. And I need to trim some branches and get them burned. And I need to go through the house and consolidate my belongings, to make moving simpler.
And I need to speak to my local SCORE chapter (the counseling arm of the Small Business Administration), to get the counseling I need to understand the business aspects of franchising. I really need to get a handle on some financial concepts.
These (and more) are all the things I think about, each time I check something else off my list. I'm succeeding. Quite frankly, it's harder than the ease which comes from doing nothing. There are days I just want to do nothing. Who would know? Who would care if I never moved? These are my dreams. I wouldn't be upsetting anyone else to just forget them because of all the work.
But I'd be letting myself down. And I've done that a lot. It's hard to avoid repeating the same disappointment. It's so easy. It's so expected. Maybe I'm dreaming too big. Can I do this alone?
Days of Doubt can be a landslide.
---Laura
Friday, January 9, 2009
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Sometimes It Really Helps
I ate with a friend last night, someone I hadn't seen in about a year. He invited me out to celebrate retiring my loan debt. Naturally, I asked how he was. I was heartened to discover that he was doing great.
I am working harder than I have in my life, but I'm doing what I most wanted to do.
And as it turns out, he's doing wonderful work, and it's going to make a big difference in people's lives. He's using his administrative skills to organize a wonderful group of professionals who will be offering free health services to the elderly and immigrant population. I was stunned by the depth of his involvement.
A few years ago when we lived closer, my friend was someone I respected. Intelligent and charming, I enjoyed him immensely, but always wondered why he was in his chosen profession, which is something in social services. He always seemed so introverted. He was always so hands off with others, so closed-lipped about himself. The first year I knew him, he didn't even tell me it was his birthday until weeks after it had passed.
Last night, he told me about a meal he prepared for 250 homeless people. And a fundraiser he held before that to raise the money needed for that dinner. And the people he'd met who helped him. And so I asked him what he thought made the difference. What he said was a lesson to me.
I realized that I was on guard emotionally, all the time. A few unhealthy people had authority over me, and I withdrew from everything. I didn't realize how withdrawn I had become.
So I've thought about that today. He explained to me that as he learned to open up to the people around him who offered encouragement and support, he realized that something nice was happening. He was beginning to shine. Not in the competitive sense really, but he was just happier. He smiled more. He rejected discouragement more. As a result, the people who were so negative had less to say. They had less authority. They had less of an impact. He began making a difference more. He began succeeding more. He began drawing people to himself who were also looking to do good things, looking to shine.
I'm not a writer of inspirational manuals, so I don't have a 12 step plan describing how this happened. But it did, obviously. I am finding the same thing happening to me.
Not every day though. Some days, I feel discouraged. I can't do this, I think. I have dreams out of my reach, and who am I to try this all by myself?
That's when it really helps to have dinner and kind words from a friend.
--Laura
I am working harder than I have in my life, but I'm doing what I most wanted to do.
And as it turns out, he's doing wonderful work, and it's going to make a big difference in people's lives. He's using his administrative skills to organize a wonderful group of professionals who will be offering free health services to the elderly and immigrant population. I was stunned by the depth of his involvement.
A few years ago when we lived closer, my friend was someone I respected. Intelligent and charming, I enjoyed him immensely, but always wondered why he was in his chosen profession, which is something in social services. He always seemed so introverted. He was always so hands off with others, so closed-lipped about himself. The first year I knew him, he didn't even tell me it was his birthday until weeks after it had passed.
Last night, he told me about a meal he prepared for 250 homeless people. And a fundraiser he held before that to raise the money needed for that dinner. And the people he'd met who helped him. And so I asked him what he thought made the difference. What he said was a lesson to me.
I realized that I was on guard emotionally, all the time. A few unhealthy people had authority over me, and I withdrew from everything. I didn't realize how withdrawn I had become.
So I've thought about that today. He explained to me that as he learned to open up to the people around him who offered encouragement and support, he realized that something nice was happening. He was beginning to shine. Not in the competitive sense really, but he was just happier. He smiled more. He rejected discouragement more. As a result, the people who were so negative had less to say. They had less authority. They had less of an impact. He began making a difference more. He began succeeding more. He began drawing people to himself who were also looking to do good things, looking to shine.
I'm not a writer of inspirational manuals, so I don't have a 12 step plan describing how this happened. But it did, obviously. I am finding the same thing happening to me.
Not every day though. Some days, I feel discouraged. I can't do this, I think. I have dreams out of my reach, and who am I to try this all by myself?
That's when it really helps to have dinner and kind words from a friend.
--Laura
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Have You Seen It?
I don't subscribe to cable or dish television. I have this memory from way back. I must have been around 4 or 5 because my family lived in Missouri. Sticking in the ground next to our house was the antennae pole. Everyone had one. I personally used it to shimmy up the side of the house, grabbing the pole and walking up the wall.
I bet other people my age have this memory. I bet no one even ten years younger can say the same. It's kind of a shame, in my personal opinion.
Anyway, I begin my post with that memory for a reason. I don't watch much television. Something I like to watch, whenever I can catch it, is Frontline. I have to be honest. The inspiring stories get me like hallmark commercials at Christmas.
Recently, they did a story I'd like to spread the word about. It was about a company who just might change the world.
The Play Pump is the brain child of an inventor and entrepreneur Trevor Field. For those of you who might not be able to view the video, this is a revolving pump that costs around $7000. It takes seven men just a day's work to put together. It is installed in playgrounds in South Africa, where children use them as merry-go-rounds. While the children are spinning on this brightly colored piece of "playground" equipment, they are doing something else. They are running a low tech system below the ground that pumps clean drinking water to the surface, filling a holding tank in the village at the rate of up to 400 gallons an hour.
Playgrounds are pretty rare in South Africa. The kids love it. Clean drinking water right in your own village can also be pretty rare, particularly in towns like Stinkwater, or in towns where the drinking water they've been using for years was contaminated.
Trevor sells ad space ON the water tanks, to pay for ongoing maintenance of the towers. One of the ad campaigns is about AIDS awareness.
"If we could put a thousand pumps in each country that's water stressed, we'd make a monster difference to rural water supplies," says Trevor Field.
So how about this? They got 16.4 million dollars from the U.S. government. And the backing of some influential rock stars. And now, they've got a new facility, employing people to make the equipment, employing people to install the pumps.
"Now we've got the facility to do it. We're going to change the world, I think."
Wow. If you get the chance to watch this, do it. This man made money in the advertising business, and at the age of 42, decided to change directions completely. And watch him when he speaks. It's the face of a man whose sitting on top of a very big, exciting secret, and he can barely contain his enthusiasm. Only it's not a secret anymore, and by sharing it, he and Play Pumps International now is on target to provide clean fresh drinking water for 10 million people by 2010. If you haven't noticed, that's next year.
Forget bottling the water from the play pump. Bottle that enthusiasm for helping others, moving beyond what you can do for yourself to what you can do for others, and I don't just think you'll improve the lives of 10 million people. I think you just might save yourself and the world.
Call me Pollyanna. It's okay.
-Laura
I bet other people my age have this memory. I bet no one even ten years younger can say the same. It's kind of a shame, in my personal opinion.
Anyway, I begin my post with that memory for a reason. I don't watch much television. Something I like to watch, whenever I can catch it, is Frontline. I have to be honest. The inspiring stories get me like hallmark commercials at Christmas.
Recently, they did a story I'd like to spread the word about. It was about a company who just might change the world.
The Play Pump is the brain child of an inventor and entrepreneur Trevor Field. For those of you who might not be able to view the video, this is a revolving pump that costs around $7000. It takes seven men just a day's work to put together. It is installed in playgrounds in South Africa, where children use them as merry-go-rounds. While the children are spinning on this brightly colored piece of "playground" equipment, they are doing something else. They are running a low tech system below the ground that pumps clean drinking water to the surface, filling a holding tank in the village at the rate of up to 400 gallons an hour.
Playgrounds are pretty rare in South Africa. The kids love it. Clean drinking water right in your own village can also be pretty rare, particularly in towns like Stinkwater, or in towns where the drinking water they've been using for years was contaminated.
Trevor sells ad space ON the water tanks, to pay for ongoing maintenance of the towers. One of the ad campaigns is about AIDS awareness.
"If we could put a thousand pumps in each country that's water stressed, we'd make a monster difference to rural water supplies," says Trevor Field.
So how about this? They got 16.4 million dollars from the U.S. government. And the backing of some influential rock stars. And now, they've got a new facility, employing people to make the equipment, employing people to install the pumps.
"Now we've got the facility to do it. We're going to change the world, I think."
Wow. If you get the chance to watch this, do it. This man made money in the advertising business, and at the age of 42, decided to change directions completely. And watch him when he speaks. It's the face of a man whose sitting on top of a very big, exciting secret, and he can barely contain his enthusiasm. Only it's not a secret anymore, and by sharing it, he and Play Pumps International now is on target to provide clean fresh drinking water for 10 million people by 2010. If you haven't noticed, that's next year.
Forget bottling the water from the play pump. Bottle that enthusiasm for helping others, moving beyond what you can do for yourself to what you can do for others, and I don't just think you'll improve the lives of 10 million people. I think you just might save yourself and the world.
Call me Pollyanna. It's okay.
-Laura
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
It's a New Year
It's probably not news by now. It's a new year.
I'm ambivalent about reaching 2009. On the one hand, times are pretty hard right now. I know so many people who are either out of work or have a spouse out of work. I think most people fear their jobs will be lost tomorrow, or next month, or before the end of this fiscal year.
I have to say something though. I'm hopeful. I'm excited. Crazy? Musings of a Pollyanna whose lost touch with reality? We'll see.
Last year, I found a plan. This year is all about working the plan. And as I said, I began last year. See, the first part of the plan is paying off two debts I have. Or had, rather. Because on January 3rd, I made the last payment on my college student loan, paying off that debt a year early, and since I had set a goal to pay it off in mid-January, I came in ahead of my own goal. I still have one debt to retire. But I have one less debt holding me back.
It's an amazing feeling. And at the end of this month, I hope to have the equivalent of one paycheck in savings. I know, it doesn't sound like a lot. I know Suze and Dave recommend a lot more. But the point is, I haven't been able to save even a single paycheck because of the money I've been pouring into my debts. Having a single paycheck saved is an accomplishment.
Another amazing feeling.
And when I talk to my friends about my plans, you should hear us. They will make suggestions or share information and we will start talking at turbo speed, talking over each other but different; building one idea on top of another rapidly because we can't get the ideas out fast enough. Each day I discover new things to add to my list of things to do. Each day, I learn more about how to accomplish the things I want. Each day I have more drive to handle tomorrow. Far from coming unglued, I'm coming unstuck.
Another amazing feeling.
I hope that when you read this, you are employed. I hope that if you are unemployed or underemployed that you will soon find work. More than that, however, I hope that you will find something even more important. I hope you find an amazing feeling. It will fuel you.
And I'll keep you posted. Keep me posted about your successes and failures. I'd like to know about them.
--Laura
I'm ambivalent about reaching 2009. On the one hand, times are pretty hard right now. I know so many people who are either out of work or have a spouse out of work. I think most people fear their jobs will be lost tomorrow, or next month, or before the end of this fiscal year.
I have to say something though. I'm hopeful. I'm excited. Crazy? Musings of a Pollyanna whose lost touch with reality? We'll see.
Last year, I found a plan. This year is all about working the plan. And as I said, I began last year. See, the first part of the plan is paying off two debts I have. Or had, rather. Because on January 3rd, I made the last payment on my college student loan, paying off that debt a year early, and since I had set a goal to pay it off in mid-January, I came in ahead of my own goal. I still have one debt to retire. But I have one less debt holding me back.
It's an amazing feeling. And at the end of this month, I hope to have the equivalent of one paycheck in savings. I know, it doesn't sound like a lot. I know Suze and Dave recommend a lot more. But the point is, I haven't been able to save even a single paycheck because of the money I've been pouring into my debts. Having a single paycheck saved is an accomplishment.
Another amazing feeling.
And when I talk to my friends about my plans, you should hear us. They will make suggestions or share information and we will start talking at turbo speed, talking over each other but different; building one idea on top of another rapidly because we can't get the ideas out fast enough. Each day I discover new things to add to my list of things to do. Each day, I learn more about how to accomplish the things I want. Each day I have more drive to handle tomorrow. Far from coming unglued, I'm coming unstuck.
Another amazing feeling.
I hope that when you read this, you are employed. I hope that if you are unemployed or underemployed that you will soon find work. More than that, however, I hope that you will find something even more important. I hope you find an amazing feeling. It will fuel you.
And I'll keep you posted. Keep me posted about your successes and failures. I'd like to know about them.
--Laura
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