giving air to my thoughts

SCORE Atlanta is an arm of the Small Business Administration, teaming businessmen, counselors with people who want to get into business.

Last year I thought of contacting them. Not yet, I told my friends. I will wait until I've retired my first debt. I'm in no position to talk about my plans to buy a franchise. I'm not in a serious position to do anything.

Meanwhile, I research. I read the newspapers in Ft. Collins and Longmont. I should be reading the Loveland paper too, but I tend to run out of time before I get that far. I've read about Urban Renewal Areas in the cities to appraise each city's vision for the next 5-10 years. I've been getting business updates from each city for months now.

I've "driven" down Main street in Longmont and down College Avenue in Ft. Collins, using the street view feature in google maps. I contact realtors to find out how much I can expect to get for my house. I keep hitting my credit card, I send a little check each paycheck to a credit union in Colorado to establish history with them. I buy kitchen faucets and topsoil to upgrade the house and get the yard ready for renters or buyers.

It's a lot. I'm alone. I need help.

So today, I contacted a counselor from SCORE. He got back to me immediately. And I emailed him my story. I don't know yet what he'll tell me. But today I put some weight behind my ideas and I shared them with someone besides supportive friends. I have this feeling that telling him WILL help me. It feels like saying something out loud for the first time. The air listens and makes the plan real.

-Laura

A Visit to Travelers Rest, Georgia

Last weekend I went to north Georgia for a dose of fall color. In my opinion, if the seasons were four sisters in the same family, fall would be the ridiculously pretty sister, the one who also had a great personality.

We were also able to stay in the city of Toccoa without spending any on lodging, thanks to my aunt, who owns a rental in Toccoa. Her mother would normally be there, but had been recently moved to a nursing home due to some health issues. So we were asked to stir up the place a little, and so that's what we did.

The visit to Travelers Rest was a bit of an accident. After a day of exploring Tallulah Falls gorge, we came back to Toccoa a little early to turn in, but a little late to do an entirely new activity, so I thought a drive to the South Carolina border would be a bit of a novelty. Toccoa sits about 20 minutes from the border, and the road you take passes by the turn to Travelers Rest. So that night, I mentioned it, and promised that we'd stop by to have a look the next morning, when we could actually see it. I doubted that it would be open on Sunday, however, but figured we could look around the grounds.

Well, Travelers Rest WAS open the next day. There was a cost to view the interior and get the tour, but you could wander the grounds for free. Admission: $4. Surprisingly, we were the only ones I saw paying the admission fee. The vast majority of people were wandering the grounds aimlessly reading signs they probably had no context for understanding.

And can I tell you something? I had no idea of the historical significance of the place. I was astounded. This unassuming spot in northeast Georgia has been touched by Creeks and Cherokees, commerce and bloodshed, Civil and Revolutionary war soldiers, politicians and merchants. It's been the crossroads of commerce and the center of obscurity. It was prized by the richest man in Tugalo Valley.

I saw it all for $4.

Some of my pictures are here.

But there's a cautionary tale here as well. The funding for the site is being cut, forcing the facility to cut days, hours and jobs. The jobs they are cutting include people who know more about this facility and the surrounding area than all but some of the oldtimers still living. We spent hours there listening to their stories, about past visitors, family reunions involving the white and black descendants of the same family line, about all the nooks and crannies of this fascinating historical gem. These same people fear for their jobs.

But here's what I'm getting at. The economy is bad these days, but this is our history. So instead of driving long distances to spend money you're concerned about parting with, go online today and find your Travelers Rest. The national register of historical places is a good place to start, and they have listings by state. They won't all be cheap tickets. But lots of historical sites are ridiculously cheap and crying for your attention. And if we don't value them, they will disappear.

If you're going to stimulate the economy, think about saying something with your money, about what you value and about what you think needs preserving. I think all historical societies will appreciate your business.

Random Monday Thoughts

I didn't get to the Museum Days on Saturday. I was planning to tour the Southern Civil War and Locomotive Museum, and it would have been outdoors. The thought of being close to possible poison ivy infestation again made me cringe. I am still itchy from my adventures this past month.

So I mowed the yard. With a weedeater. My mower is busted. I'm sure it's not serious, but I can't fix it.

But that's a task I'm going to put off until next spring. In the meantime, I'm going to pay down a student loan. If I'm able to stay focused, it will be paid off before the grass is green again.

I learned recently that the only real mark against my credit is my debt load. In this troubling economy, I feel fortunate. I can put extra money on the two debts I still have. I have a great dad who also works with me on a one of these debts, both by keeping me focused and by making a contribution "to the cause" each time he sees that I have made a payment of my own. I am not getting behind, I am getting ahead. And when I compare my situation with others, my debts are pretty small indeed. Once they are paid, I will have plans in place to steer my financial independence into a new life for myself. It's something I find exciting, and I don't even see the entire picture yet.

Most of the canvas of my life remains to be painted.

There are days when I'm impatient to move forward. And then a day like today happens, when the economy pops and the government buyout plan fails. I see clearly on days like today that even if I was in the position financially to carry out some of my plans, the economy wouldn't be ready for me. Eventually it will be, and by then, I will be ready to put some of those larger plans into action.

But I have smaller plans too. Smaller chunks that include my personal life and not just what I want in a career. And I can work on those smaller, personal chunks today. I don't have to have the entire picture of my life painted and drying on canvas before I make my first step. Who would even want that?

So here's a goalgetter revelation. I'm going to leave Atlanta in 2009. There, I've said it. I'm tired of the traffic. I'm tired of where I'm working. I'm tired of making the best of a bad situation. I moved here to further my career and improve my quality of life and neither one happened. I gave it a long and honest shot. I waited for my reward as a thoughtful and diligent employee. But that reward is not coming. So I'm going to do this for myself. And I don't want to live in the south anymore. I've made friends here. I've made good friends here. I've become part of a community. But it is not my home.

A while ago, I graduated from a college in Colorado and I came back to the south to be near my family, and also, frankly, because I didn't have any better ideas. I've reflected on that decision a lot this past year, and I realized something. It was a mistake. I should have stayed out there. I should have gotten my knuckles bruised. I should have taken my hard knocks. Because bruises and knocks are unavoidable, and because Colorado is where I felt at home. I didn't spare myself any hardships, or avoid any tough lessons. But I think I have less to show for my hard work, because I'm not happy with where I am.

So I'm going to change it.

--Laura